Formal Essay 2 Rewriting

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Hyongwon Jeon

Prof. Kyle Brebner

IERW(04)

20. November 2015

Degree behind a Monitor

Nowadays, more universities are adopting online courses for student convenience. There are universities which offer a full degree solely from online classes and more cyber universities are newly established every year. Although the courses can be effectively used in a short period of time, colleges should not make the choice of using them in the long run. To explain, online courses have negative effects for both the student and the professor: being unable to learn the value of school life, being lazy about studying, and providing difficulty for evaluation for professors.

To start with, online courses deprive students of the opportunity to learn the value of school life. After three years of harsh high school, university is a place where students can build up life experiences other than only studying. Since online courses offer ubiquitous environment for studying, many students who study online choose to both study, and work in a society. Compared to schools which provide students with various ways to develop themselves by extracurricular activities such as volunteering and clubs, relatively limited chances are given for students who take online courses. Unlike universities, a society is known as a competitive battlefield. In companies, workers compete for promotion and are sometimes forced to make harsh choices for their career. To add, society regards school life as a major factor to decide whether to employ a worker or not. While most students are focused on studying exams during high school years, university can be a place to learn social skills, such as cooperation from team work. Also, students are able to learn how to behave with responsibility through making a choice on their own without the help of others.

Another reason for online courses being negative is that these can have a danger of weakening the pupil’s will to learn. We should remember that laziness is a result of freedom. In other words, when students are given a specific amount of time to take the class without checking each student’s attendance, they tend to delay the learning until right before the due date. The learning is no longer a priority to the students on Mondays. Students live happily during the six days and get busy on Sunday night, which disturbs them to think deep and study in a relaxed environment. On top of that, it is much easier for students to lose concentration during class hours online. Students mainly use computers or smartphones for cyber lectures, which disturb students to mainly focus on the lectures. While studying online can be intervened by various situations as students can choose to learn on their own, common university courses enable students to actively concentrate, and participate during class since a professor has the control for the class.

Professors may also struggle while evaluating students when students are allowed to take all their classes online. In normal classes, the professor can easily communicate with a pupil in real time, and set the level of difficulty for the lecture. Additionally, learners are exposed to a lot of irritating factors from people around, their learning tool, or even themselves: the inability to control their laziness. Professors cannot know whether the learner really heard the lecture or watched a movie while chatting with his or her friends. Thus, the efficiency of class can be critically lowered. The fact that students cannot do face-to-face communication with the professors further causes a major problem of online classes: the test unable to be a fair evaluation tool. Even though alternative assessments could be possible, Korean universities still rely deeply on the tests to see whether students understood the lectures content. Provided that students substitute school from online courses, the test simply becomes an open-book test. There is a risk of pupils using materials from the book, media or even friends.

 To conclude, although online courses are preferred by many people for their comfort, students should not be able to take all their classes online. Rather, schools should provide various activities other than studying and support their learning with strict control in classrooms. With outline courses, professors are also able settle their evaluation systems while communicating with students in class. Before simply adapting all online courses, we should ask the following question. Does school only exist for studying? Can Internet control learners?  

   

Persuasive Essay: Stop Trying to be Multi

              Currently, the global world is strongly influenced by multilingualism. Employees are not able to survive in their companies with only one language. Following this trend, there are countries who consider having two official languages. Even though Korea's decision on the two languages may benefit the nation by diversity of languages, it will certainly cause serious problems on communication and finance.

 

             Two official languages can first cause difficulty in communicating among people. A language has its own form and develops variously region by region. The most important value a language has is the delivery of the meaning. People should be able to convey their purpose through languages. If Korea had two languages, there would be thousand forms of dialects that blcoks proper communication. We can clearly see how different languages put distance between citizens by North Korea, as an example. While North and South Korea both use Korean as an official language, the use or the way it sounds differ significantly. South Koreans cannot speak North Korean fluently.

 

               Second, financial problems can also occur from using two official languages. As the choice is made by the government, it should provide effecrive language programs to suit the majority of citizens. To learn a new language takes consdierable time and effort. Schools, companies, public institutions should be able to adopt learning programs, educational materials widely. In other words, the cost for the second official language is expected to raise financial debt for the government to support citizens for something new.

 

               Besides the negative effects mentioned considering this decision, the choice still may floruish the nation through language diversity. Different languages have their own ways of interpreting the world. By using two languages, ctizens would be able to expand the eye for diverse cultural experiences in this global world. Moreover, a language is used to express the nation's history, value, or culture. Considering the triaits of languages, it is important to view two official language policy as a way to help citizens express cultures in two distinct, unique ways.

 

                Even though more and more countries are trying to make citizens a multi player, we should stop trying to be multi at least in languages. The language diversity should not tease the government concealing the serious results such as difficultes in communication between people, and finance. Korea should have one official language, Korean, which still provides citizens with great pride and comfort by its own.

Formal Essay 1 Rewriting

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Research based essay: Cyberlegs

       Cyberlegs is a joint project by a number of European institutions including the University of Ljubljana in Slovenia, and Scuola Superiore Sant'Anna di Pisa. Researchers from these schools have been working on the project since 2012. The project has a goal of developing an artificial cognitive system for assisting amputees in daily activities. It can be meaningful to understand the way it works, and the significance in the field of biomedical engineering.

 

              Cyberlegs enable amputees to walk, climb stairs, move with a minimum cognitive, energetic effort. The basic principle of cyberlegs lies in copying the amputee’s habitual leg movement with a motor. The leg includes a sensor, which reads the angle of one’s ankle, or the strength applied to the legs while walking. And the motor artificially makes a movement such as kicking the ground or spinning the ankle. This differs greatly from original prosthetic limbs. The original limbs do not involve ankle movements, which results in lack of stability. However, with the help of cyberlegs, the amputee can walk, climb the stairs, or move with a minimum cognitive and energetic effort much more naturally. 

 

               Last year, Juliano Pinto, who is paralyzed from the waist down, kicked the World cup football using an exoskeleton connected to the neurons in his brain. Pinto simply had to think  about how to kick the ball and the science helped the physical movement. Likwise, the Cyberlegs project took a step forward in terms of biomedical engineering. Biomedical engineering (BME) applies engineering principles and design concepts to medicine and biology for healthcare purposes. Unlike other science projects, cyberlegs solely focus on the movement of a human being combining engineering to human life. As the interaction force between cyberlegs and the amputee is the moving power of them, the project effectively shows how engineering can effectively help daily human life.

                To conclude, the project Cyberlegs made an effective tool for amputees using a motor which copies the leg movement of the user. It is important as a way of combining science into real human life. Although the project still needs further financial, medical improvements, Cyberlegs has made a new major contribution in biomedical engineering.